merin: day 4 \ shoeaday

I’ve heard quite enough about Sketcher “Shape-Ups” thank you very much. First of all, they make you look ridiculous and they probably don’t do anything but completely screw up your alignment. Second, if you want a real calf/leg/butt workout, four inch platforms are the way to go.

Some women (Rachel Zoe) claim that stiletto heals make you feel sexy. I think they are missing a couple of steps:

(1) In order to walk in these extraordinarily beautiful and expensive little munchins I have to constantly flex my toes and squeeze my gluteus maximus. Now, that action in itself doesn’t make me feel particularly sexy.

(2) But then you think, wait a minute… this is what models must have to do constantly.

(3) OMG – I’m doing something that a model does. Double OMG – I’m (almost) as tall as a model! WE’RE PRACTICALLY THE SAME PERSON.

(4) Now I feel confident… like I have just walked out of a Gucci print ad and am not only tall, tone- I am probably bronzed and glowing in the sun a la Gucci gals. The sum of which (butt squeezing + model height + imaginary glowiness) all equals:

(5) Sexy. Like Heidi Klum sexy. And how is it again that (straight) men don’t understand this?

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